To the mama scared of public school

Dear Mom who has decided to send her child to public school,

I know that this is one of the hardest decisions of your entire life.  I know that you want to hold your little munchkin a while longer and not have to worry about what educational route you are going to take.  Yet, here you are, getting ready to register your child for kindergarten in a public school.

You've heard the horror stories:  Your child will be exposed to Darwinism, lesbian/gay lifestyles, children who aren't cared for, words they shouldn't know, and a poor educational system.  They will just be a number on a test and a student in a room with a stressed out teacher who doesn't have the time to spend with all of the children in her class.  The stories scare you.  I know because they've scared me.

You've been subjected to the all too familiar look that comes from people who have chosen a different educational route and you feel ashamed.  You wonder if they think that you don't care enough about your child to choose to do without so that they can go to a private school.  Do they think you are lazy because you aren't homeschooling? Are you just not worried about how your child is raised...what about God, what about their self-esteem, what about their love for learning?  How could you choose to allow someone else to teach your child?  These questions keep you up at night as you agonize if you are really making the right decision.

You are constantly feeling like you have to explain yourself.  You start out every school conversation with, "Well, she will be in public school, but we really thought about going a different route..."  

Can I tell you something, sweet mama?  It's OK that you chose public school.  It's OK that you didn't take out a loan to go to a private school.  It's OK that you looked at the needs of your entire family unit and realized that homeschooling is not in your best interest for now...maybe never.  

And your baby?  Your sweet child will be fine.  The same God that dwells in your heart goes with him/her even into the public schools.  

We've been in this Kindergarten year for almost 7 months and here's what I've experienced:

1.   My sweet girl is greatly adored and looked after by a staff of educators who truly care about her well-being.  These teachers - who are definitely over-worked and under-paid - love to see ALL their students learning.  So, they work long hours each school day (and often on the weekends) so that they can make sure that their students have the best resources possible to learn in a variety of ways. My child has never once complained about feeling like the teacher or the Teacher Assistant is ignoring her.

2. Her school is locked and secure during the day.  Do I feel badly that she has a police officer present at her school?  Absolutely not.  They're present at our church.  They live in our neighborhood.  To her, it's just the norm.

3.  We have been exposed to not even a handful of situations that have required intervention.  Each situation was resolved quickly and effectively.  Sweet girl?  No worse for the ware. 

4.  There is prayer in public schools.  You may just not see it. There are teachers all over my daughter's school who love Jesus just as much as I do.  You don't think they pray during the day?  How can they not? My sweet girl knows she can call on Jesus whenever she needs to.  Her Christian foundation started at home and continues to thrive at home and through church.  She knows her Bible stories and it's OK that it's not carried over into all of her education lessons.  At least we are OK with that because God's given us peace.
5.  My daughter did learn a bad word...actually a bad symbol.  We addressed the situation with her and she knows now not to do it.  We handled the situation the same way we had to a few months earlier when both her and our four-year-old came home from church and told us a word that they had learned from a child there.

6.  My little girl has seen a child act out in class due to a disability.  She has talked with us about it and she has learned to be that child's friend.  Nothing has made me prouder than listening to her tell me about how she watches out for him.  I've seen her heart grow since starting school and it has made my heart want to burst with joy.

7.  Educationally, she has learned so much.  Way more than this mama caring for an infant and a four-year-old would have been able to teach her on a daily basis.  She has thrived in this area and I seriously could not ask for more.

8.  She has learned about different traditions (things like Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, etc) and it has not phased her.  She hasn't questioned our religious practices as a result. She is confident in who she is and Whose she is because we have and continue to instill that in her.

9.  She has and continues to have fun.  She has bad days and good days.  There are days she doesn't want to go and days that she is excited about getting there.  There are days she misses her family a lot and days she acts like she can't believe it's already time to be at home again.  She is just like every other child her age.

10.  She knows she is loved.  She probably knows a little too well (if that's even possible) that she is adored.  She is sent to school every morning with a prayer and a huge hug and is greeted after school with a smile and another huge hug.  She is content and because of that, I am, too.  I miss her like crazy every day.  I always want her home with me, but I know that this is a great opportunity for her and it's what works best for our family at this time.  

11.  Just because I'm not her teacher from 8:00 until 2:30 during the week, doesn't mean for a second that I have stopped looking for ways to help her learn and grow.  I'm her mom and that's what I do.  Her dad and I were and continue to be her first teachers.

And those questions? The ones that are currently keeping you up at night?  A lot of them will go away throughout the year.  And, most of those mamas you think are judging you, are not.  They have their fears, too.  Their questions may look different, but they stem from the same reason...we all just want what's best for our children.

So, as I prepare to sign up my oldest son for public school Kindergarten in less than two months, I do so with less trepidation of what's to come.  I still have my mama fears because what mama doesn't?  Yet, I know that we will be OK because, ultimately, God's got this.  

Philippians 4:6-7  “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”