Bravely Whispering

Dear Brogan,

You want to be brave like superheroes. 

In public, you are quiet.  Crowds of children your own age make you nervous.  You want to speak, but sometimes the words just don't come out.  I see in your eyes how you long to play with others, but it's not always easy for you to just join in activities with people you don't know.

So, when the tears and nerves came flooding in just a couple hours before your Kindergarten orientation, I somewhat expected it, but it still concerned me.  So, I prayed...and I had other people pray.  

Then the time came...

Your moment to enter into the room that will house hundreds of your thoughts and feelings for the next nine months.  The place that you will grow...without your mom and dad there to hold your hand or give you a reassuring smile.  You entered with trepidation, but, you entered!

As I watched you sit at your desk - making sure that I sat beside you - I saw it in your eyes:

Anxiety.  Fear.  Uncertainty.  All mixed together.

Yet, you stayed. You didn't let the negative thoughts prevent you from savoring that moment.  Your opportunity to sit at your first elementary school desk for your first time.

As the teacher talked, your eyes grew bigger.  Your hand would often touch my arm as if to say, "Mommy, we're in this together, right?"  Sometimes I would pat your hand, sometimes I'd just let you leave it there.  Trying to figure out what you needed from me at that moment.  Keenly aware that the next time you enter that room, I will be leaving you for a few hours to figure this all out on your own.

Then came the real test.  Daddy loves to talk about the "One Shining Moment" in college basketball.  This was your shining moment:  the time to talk to your teacher.  Just like a basketball player doesn't know if his last attempt to make a shot will get his team the winning victory, I wasn't so sure if you'd be able to conquer this moment.

You did!! 

It was just a whisper to your teacher, but it screamed bravery to this mama.  Sometimes bravery doesn't show up loudly and proclaim its victory...sometimes the biggest bravery comes in doing the tasks that seem daunting.  Sometimes bravery shines through with a whisper.

You, my son, are brave.